My Coronadiary 08/04/2020 – I’m Not A Pheasant Plucker

I love our wildlife. I love it enough to pay a monthly donation to the World Wildlife Fund as I don’t want to see any more animals become extinct or get badly treated. And, of course, David Attenborough is a god.

Because I’m a country boy at heart, one highlight for me after working a night shift in Taunton (especially during this fine weather) is my 7am drive home across the beautiful Quantock Hills.

This morning was extra special. A buzzard flew alongside my car for a few metres before spotting his breakfast and diving into a hedge. A pair of foxes crossed right in front of me without a care in the world and I watched as a gang of crows mobbed a hovering kestrel who had flown too close to their nests. Either that or it was a Liverpool fan.

Today’s champagne moment though was seeing a herd of about 10 red deer, including a stag, roaming across a field. I slowed down to watch these beautiful creatures for a few minutes before they disappeared into a wood. However, when I looked back at the road, I ran straight over a pheasant.

Obviously I hate running animals over, but pheasants make it really difficult for themselves. They are the Donald Trump of the bird world: really fucking noisy and flashy but also utterly ridiculous and not very bright. They’ve even got stupid haircuts.

Anyway, I’m off to bed. Behave yourselves and stay safe.

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